Moving in or out with your boyfriend

 

You’re thinking about moving out with your significant other yet, there’s a tiny pit in your stomach making you question this idea. Moving out is a huge decision that should not be rushed. My boyfriend and I have been moved out for a year and a half now. This has been the best experience we both could have ever expected. I believe moving out together worked so well for us because we really thought through every obstacle we might face moving out. To make sure you are ready to move out with your significant other, my main points are bold and I think are important to go over before you move out.

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Money and Financing: The number one reason many have yet to move out at all is due to money. Which makes total sense considering rent is completely and utterly OUTRAGEOUS nowadays. Aside from the rent cost you will have tons of other fees that are heading your way. Utilities for one (the reason you turn off the lights before leaving) add up rather quickly. This specifically means water, electricity, and heat. Do your research and make sure you can pay rent AND utilities. Also we have (assuming you don’t have these things) furniture, household items (toilet paper, medicine, dish sponges,plates and cups, paper towels, towels and much more), groceries (man does it cost a lot to eat), pet supplies, house cleansers, detergents (laundry and dishwasher) and so much more. Highly recommend you do research and make sure you can afford rent AND all of the other bells and whistles before you decide move out.

Food: I know I already mentioned food as a recurring expense however their is a bit more i’d like to cover when it comes to food and or groceries.On average my boyfriend and I spend $200 every 2 weeks. It’s crazy how much it costs to eat and how fast it all goes, you will quickly discover this when you move out for yourself. Besides the money another factor is agreeing on foods. My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years and great friends for more than that and I still to this day am learning what foods he likes and doesn’t like. I also find it changes frequently making things even more difficult. Same with yourself, the only advice I can give is put in the effort to go grocery shopping with each other. Grocery shopping sucks but I guarantee you will enjoy it more with your significant other. This way you don’t have to worry about getting foods he/she won’t like. And the extra pair of hands is always convenient!

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Time: At first moving out can make every night feel like a date night but with time that will go away. It is important you both make time for each other. Its expensive to move out because of this people tend to work more, sleep more, and be more tired all around. Not saying this is bad (believe me I understand) but you still want to have YOU time. And of course time for BOTH of you. Rather it be eating out, bored games, concerts, the zoo, hikes, runs, or even coloring, Anything as long as it is set aside for you time or both of your time. Focus on your relationship and yourself. Keep you and your relationship healthy and go out and be active.

Discovering each other (and I mean… completely): When you move out you will shortly begin noticing and/or learning new aspects about each other. Let’s say your SO (significant other) snores.. This might aggravate you by keeping you up but you need to remember this isn’t their fault. Or what about the bathroom? Do you plan to shut the door and what about your SO? Frankly we don’t really care and just leave the door open. I mean we close it if we have to… well, I am sure you guessed it! For some reason many of my friends have brought this to me as a problem they are nervous for. In my opinion it’s important to think of the little things you might not think about. Thoroughly discuss things you like and dislike with your SO.

Fighting/Arguing: In my experience, my boyfriend and I got along even better when we formally moved out together. But this is not commonly one’s experience, many seem to notice more bickering, arguments, and fighting. Which makes total sense, you went from seeing each other periodically to seeing each other constantly. That is now your home. You don’t just leave when things get tough, where are you going to go? It’s time to put your big kid pants on and mature up. Decide what matters and what doesn’t matter. Is the dispute worth it? Will it impact the future? Sometimes you have to be the bigger person and give in. Hopefully you both can see it isn’t worth losing what you have. That being said, if your SO ever lays a hand on you LEAVE save yourself and others all of the troubles that come with abusive relationships. I am always willing to talk if you ever need advice or simply just someone to talk to just message me.

balance

Balance: All in all balance is key. Sit down together and balance out anything and everything. Sit down and go over ALL of your finances, write it all down and go from there. Set time aside for yourself, maybe go see family or hangout with friends. Set time aside for you AND your SO, go on dates or binge a Netflix show together. Most importantly talk, about it all, from little to big, and honestly everything in between. If you don’t it’s sure to surface at some point. You will be growing together, taking care of each other when sick, and dealing with all the other factors I’ve mentioned.

Moving out all in all has taught me many things. For one if you have a strong relationship, can afford to, and intend to learn EVERYTHING  about each other then you too might be ready to move out. This certainly doesn’t cover everything and I highly advise you to do more research and speak to those around you who might have this experience of their own. Have fun and be happy. Stay safe and smart when it comes to moving out because this is a huge step in a relationship.

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